October 17, 2004
Lessons and odd thoughts re-learned, derived, or overhauled: part 2 of 8
I am I ...
- A thousand people, a thousand wonders: but my way is Right.
- The measure of another's rationality or intelligence lies in the degree of the other's adherence to one's own paradigm.
- Where faith is invested solely in the letters behind one's name, nothing different, not though it be the equivalent, not though it be even deeper in actual knowledge or insight or experience, can ever suffice.
- A world without apparent cause or effect or reason can be a terrifying place - yet that is the only world possible to someone truly absorbed in oneself. Not narcissicists, not they: for narcissicists require an audience.
- "I can't" too often means "I won't".
- Intense personal sensitivity and resultant suffering makes it impossible to see that of others.
- Any attempt to short-loop a determined single track usually results in derailment.
- To measure everyone against oneself, in all things, is inevitably to be disappointed. (And yet, ironically: most of us wouldn't do well with a person entirely in our own image. Such is the extent of our own lack of self-honesty.)
- "You won't let me do anything!" means that you did not allow the one thing I really really really wanted to do at this particular moment.
- Where there is no established sense of independent self, any attempt to say "No" (or even to do otherwise than is assumed) must be seen as a personal threat.
- A thousand people, a thousand wonders goes the saying: but for you it is a condemnation, while for me it is an explanation and/or excuse justifying why I don't have to change.
- What is not done my way demonstrates ingratitude.
- Advice is one expression of the give-and-take of a relationship's entangled selves. An uncontrollable compulsion to give advice on all things, even those not at all understood, indicates complete absence of a sense of self in any way independent of others. The concept of ad hoc personal boundaries is sometimes used to compensate for such a lack, but only ever as a prosthesis.
- To someone who dwells in personal intense emotion, even powerful emotions unvoiced by others are effectively non-existent - and will come without apparent reason when they are finally given voice.
- Something in which one truly is not interested will never be mentioned, or even thought of, without specific stimulus. Constant mention, even in the negative, is a sure sign of real interest.
- "I have done everything!" tends to mean all one or two alternatives I thought of.
- The specific case deals with the here-and-now and with the was, and acknowledges the importance of context. The general case attempts a future participle, and acknowledges the relevance of inversion. Refusal to see the first denies predictability. Refusal to see the second denies the individual. In both extremes lies an implicit personal threat: in the first, the potential of a less partial justice which just might rule against us; in the second, the potential of a non-objective (and thus non-absolute) universe.
- The urge to generalise might be innate to human beings. How else would they ever internalise the rules of language?
- Complete lack of interest negates any possible conversation.
- A passion adopted from another but never internalised will eventually be abandoned: what is not one's own will not be pursued.
- Nothing must ever interfere with Pronouncement. Any consequences which happen to occur as a result of Pronouncement are never the Pronouncer's responsibility.
- Take whatever action you wish that affects only yourself. Just don't expect me to support something I don't agree with. If you still find my support absolutely necessary to your taking the action ... why is that?
- Non-possessive, non-domination love is far, far more difficult than hate, because it requires an a priorieffort to try to understand the other.
- A priori non-trust trumps everything.